Hearts

Valentines Day is coming up, and I’ve always wondered where this holiday came from.

I mean, christmas comes from Jesus Christ, which is why it’s called “christ”mas, the easter holiday also has something to do with the church, and then halloween is the night of ghouls and ghosts and saints and stuff. But Valentines Day has never made much sense to me, also it has depressed me. I never used to have a valentine, but now I do. My gf/fiance is my valentine. And it’s a nice feeling.

It’s not the candy or the cards that have always plauged me with questions about this holiday, although both are very good and worthy of finding the answers to, what’s plauged ME is the heart. Now, here’s a little heart test, look at this image:

HEART #1

Now, clearly this is a beautiful image, one that shows love, happyness, a desire to be with someone you truly care about, the way I feel about my gf/fiance. But the sad truth is, hearts don’t really seem this romantic. Here’s an image of a REAL heart.

HEART #2

THIS IS NOT FLUFFY OR LOVEABLE. It’s your ORGAN! This is what pumps blood into you and keeps you alive! How did this become entangled and romantacized to the point of gross stupidity where it’s considered romantic. Maybe if you’re a serial killer blood is romantic, but I highly doubt that.

The thing that sucks, is the person who can honestly be the sweetest guy at Valentines Day is a surgeon. Because he can literally bring his wife home a heart and give it to her.
“Honey, you’ve stolen my heart.”
How creepy would that be?

Ugh.

But these fake hearts are everywhere, post cards, e-mails, internet, tv, books, movies, everywhere! They’re like angels. Angels are on all those things too, we live in a very spiritual age. Look, the point is this, hearts are not romantic, and surgeons are lucky sons of bitches for being able to actually bring home a heart to their wives.

I wonder what he brings home for Veterans Day or Labor Day.
“Honey, I’m home, and guess what, this year we’re taking in an old sickly veteran from that wal-mart across town!”
Or
“Honey, this year, I got us some labors to celebrate labor day! They’re mexicans and they came from Home Depot. They work for dirt cheap!”

These are stereotypical, but hey, this is America.

That’s all we focus on.

MW