Reminders

That’s right, you get two blog posts today, you special tyke you.

I got a reminder for my friend Colton’s birthday on myspace. My “aunt” just forgot my birthday because her calendar wasn’t turned to the right month, thus proving my upcoming theory. I believe that without these reminders, nobody would ever remember anything about anyone else. We’ve become so accustomed to being told that something is coming up, with calendars and reminders on websites or the computer that we can’t function without them. Because think about it, really….how much do people REALLY like eachother? Not too f*ckin’ much, we KILL one another for fun. So yeah. Not too f*ckin’ much.

BUT….this doesn’t change the fact that because of that fact, people wouldn’t remember anything. Nobody likes anybody. Moral of America. I truly think that without these little reminders, nobody would ever remember birthdays or anniversaries or whatever. I got a phone call from one friend, and one friend on my birthday came over. That’s IT. Nobody else f*ckin’ remembered.

When people fart, they blame it on the dog.
When people forget your birthday, they blame it on the calendar.

m@rk

Cell Phone Innovation

I have a great idea for when you go to the movies and have a cell phone.

They always ask you to “please silence your cell phones now”. This infuriates many people, as they don’t like being told what to do, by ANYBODY, and so subconsciously, they decide, “No, screw YOU theater, I WON’T silence my cell phone!” And they leave it on. Then halfway through a hospital room scene where someone’s mother is dying from cancer, you hear La Cooka Racha begin to play, in MIDI form. So, my invention.

Well, I think they should install two detectors at the theater doors. Not the front of the actual outside theaters. I mean the doors where you walk in through to sit down and watch the film. And once you go through, they detect you have a cell phone, and send a signal to whatever service you have, and that service shuts down your cell phone connection for the rest of the time you’re in there. Once you leave, it once again notifies the company, and the company sets your cell phone back on. That way nobody would ever be told what to do, and we wouldn’t have festive mexican music playing at funerals.

I really do think this would work, and I know for a fact that we have the technology to make it work. We just don’t want to because I’m telling us we should. People are so f*cking egotistical.

m@rk