I’m going to tell you a story.
When I was, oh I’d say maybe 11, my real father and his brother took me for a ride on their Harley Davidson Motercycle. Who the FUCK in their right mind puts an 11 year old boy on a motercycle!? HONESTLY?! Everytime I’d ask him if he was going to come see me, he’d say yes then come over drunk. Or he’d get drunk while there. Or he just wouldn’t show up at ALL. My stepdad may have put a roof over my head, had food on the table for me and helped me with alot of things-including actually have a lot of the same interests that I do-but he lacked an emotional core. He couldn’t love me. He DOESN’T. Not LOVE love. So technically, I don’t consider myself having a father. And this is why father’s day is a very very VERY cold holiday for me.
I want to become a parent for 2 reasons. The first is that I just love my girlfriend to death and want to raise a family with her. The second is to give children something I never had. As cold as I may seem sometimes, I actually DO have an emotional core. But enough being sweet, it’s starting to make me feel sick. Onto BITCHING.
I’d like to start by saying FUCK FATHERS. Being a father is NOT that hard. You treat your child with the same respect that YOU want. Parents always say, “Treat others the way you’d want to be treated” but NEVER follow their own fucking advice. You can punish them, yes, but don’t be severe about it. If your child is arguing, sure, send them to their room. FOR AN HOUR or so, not for three fucking days! But if your child sneaks out of the house and keys a car, then yes, ground them for a week. But no more. Maybe even less, like 3 days. When your child isn’t speaking to you or seems distant, take them to do something that they enjoy and ask them what’s up. Talk to them. GET TO KNOW YOUR CHILDREN. That’s the whole problem with this generation of kids, none of their parents KNOW THEM! And their parents don’t talk to their children about sex except for the weasel way out of it phrases: “I’ll tell you when you’re older” or “Don’t have it”. So what do they do? They get the advice from their friends, the media, places that are SO MUCH better than where they SHOULD be getting it from.
But you want to know the most important thing you can do for your child? Yes, support them in whatever they decide they are or want to be for a career but it’s not the top one. TELL THEM YOU LOVE THEM. Hearing the phrase, “I love you” everyday, whether it’s at the start or the end of the day, always always ALWAYS helps. It raises self esteem and makes them feel wanted. To be a father, you have to start as a boy, then grow up into a man. But a lot of people are stuck on what the correct definition of a man IS. So I’ve laid out the following keypoints of what a real man is:
- Treats everyone equally
- Admits he has feelings and lets himself show them
- Treats women with respect
- Supports his family
- Would die for the ones he loves
You see, it’s not that hard to be a man. When you’re a little boy you get a crush on that little girl next door. Maybe you kiss a few times because it’s exciting. When you’re a teenager, you may run through a series of girlfriend’s which isn’t a bad thing honestly because you’re trying to find someone who will accept every part of you and that YOU can love. And maybe when you’re in your late teens, you may find someone you think is perfect and you fall madly in love and realize this is the girl you want to marry and have children with. To want to have children with someone, to love someone THAT MUCH, says something about yourself. It says you’d do anything for them, and your love for them is unlike your love for anything or anyone else in this entire WORLD.
The only sad thing to this entire thing is that all fathers go to hell. And you know what Hell is right? It’s Andy Gibb, singing “Shadow Dancing” for eons and eons and eons and you have to wear plaid flanel and bellbottoms and headgear and sit next to everyone you fucked over in life. It’s nice to know that there’s so much to look forward to in life.
m@rk
